textbooks cost ridiculous amounts of money… i have spent about.. $450 on books and reading materials today.. for a grand total of TWO classes -_- really people. whatta way to rip off college students and their parents…

i actually got out of the first day of class early today! first time in awhile, i think. most business classes (and science, i guess), start lecturing on the first day now, to make the most of time… so yay =) except that prof doesn’t seem all that wonderful.. assigned seating?? yay elementary school…

i got to thinking yesterday.. human reasoning really conflicts with God’s expectations… actually, i was confused at first, because i thought something was conflicting but couldn’t figure out what it was…
but yes. God tells us to forgive indefinitely, just like He forgives us without end.  but common sense tells us to learn from our mistakes, from our past.  so if someone had hurt us in the past, shouldn’t we wipe our hands of them and move on? “fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me.” ..i don’t know about other people, but i’m not a big fan of being shamed, of being made a fool of.  but we’re supposed to… =(
i guess it’s just.. tiring and weary, to have to somewhat forgive (i’m not very good at forgiving completely.. i just..act it i guess? =) and forget (somewhat better at this..) and have the same thing happen again, knowing that i could have prevented it because it had happened countless times before.. knowing that eventually it’s just gonna be my fault for it happening to me because i allow it…
and then…. if i feel this way, how does God feel to have EVERYONE constantly mess up? He forgives (fully and completely) and forgets (even though He has a perfect memory), just to have it happen again and again and again….
sigh. trying to be like Jesus is really hard..

and no, even if it sounds like i’m drawing from a recent specific occurance, i have nothing in mind while writing this… just something that popped up yesterday..

alrighty, back to the swing of things
hopefully not as much failure and laziness this semester…

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