is it… wrong, or strange, that whenever austin stone talks about “ministering to the city” and speaks about austin… my mind wanders off and thinks about china?  i’ve been here in austin for most of the last 2 years, and yet i don’t know if this is “my city”.  is this just something i’m supposed to break free of, and just force it to be “my city”?  because this is going to be where i am for most of the next 3 (at least) years… and like.. after china i think singapore… austin and sugar land are like.. tied for 3rd.

i dunno.

everytime i go back, though, i just go with the flow.. nothing much about God, aside from what we do as a group.  but everything outside is just.. normal, without mention of God or why i’ve been going.  so what is it that makes everything so much easier to think about, than to do?

even when i pray, it’s just.. overwhelming… like.. how do people pray everyday for the same thing(s), without ceasing?  because there are more and more things to pray about, and then eventually a 2 minute prayer is going to increase to 2 hours, and then even 2 hours isn’t enough to list everyone else’s prayer requests… because if you want to diligently pray for something specific, pray consistently for a period of time, and then you pray for more and more… then it just becomes a list. so how does that work?

<consistency needs work>

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